Not the best day it was. The last post was about a wonderful day. I was fine that day. But this day I ain’t doing well. There is a saying, “A healthy mind in a healthy body.” My body and mind aren’t so close to fine. Couldn’t really make good use of time today. That upcoming exam… is just a “let it happen” thing now.

This pain in my body got me nicely. I’ve been facing it for the last two days. This type of pain neither lets me sit nor lie in bed. As the pain has become unbearable, I couldn’t help visiting the doc.

Doc didn’t do much. Just prescribed me some meds and, obviously, some freaking tests. Doing these tests is so time-consuming and a great hassle. I had to complete 6 medical tests. And it took five hours! It wouldn’t take time if these tests didn’t have many requirements. Also, a long queue I had to go through, so definitely it would take that much time. Wasting much time just before my board exam! Unfortunate circumstances are surely unavoidable. Sometimes people curse doctors just because they prescribe so many tests. I am also annoyed. But we can’t deny the fact that these tests are for us and just to determine the disease.

How much does it take to be a professional doctor? It takes years and a lot of dedication to get those acronyms beside one’s name. Can AI replace all the doctors?

Whatever, I always forget to take earphones with me before going somewhere. I regret it a lot! I can waste a lot of time scrolling social media at home, but whenever I go somewhere, I don’t really feel like scrolling much. It doesn’t feel so joyful for some reason.

On these devastating days I miss some people. I wish they were here. At least I could share what I am feeling, as I used to share everything with them. It actually feels good if I have my family, friends, and loved ones stay by my side. I once didn’t feel so alone. Sadly, doing certain activities still makes me upset and makes me miss them. It’s not actually… but I miss that I… I don’t know. Though, it doesn’t actually make me upset, but rather it makes me tranquil. I just wonder. I don’t even wonder. No, I wonder about those days. Nature somehow reminds me of those.

I don’t want to forget all the things; maybe some I wanna forget. I believe we may not have been the best with each other, but that time taught me and made me feel a lot of things. I learned how it feels to be with them. People come, people go, but their taught lessons and memories remain. Insensible somewhere deep inside us which sometimes gets its sense, such as mine got in sense today.

I thought them got me and me got them but them got people and me got none. That makes me laugh sometimes. Them will get people and me will keep misleading myself by thinking them are for me and me are for them. Yeah, it’s the “them” and “me” manner; it sounds cool to me.

So they were fine, are fine, will be fine, and I… also am good. They keep telling me to just get over it. Then I asked myself, “Did we start to just get over it?” I still don’t know the answer. I wasn’t the most honest person. Pretty much I was not the best guy that someone should deserve. Yet, a lot to improve. They taught me that, and I found it legit. I tried everything. But I had my own issues. Pretty bad issues, I guess. I sometimes ask myself, “Wasn’t I the best for them?” Then I asked myself, “Didn’t you suck their blood?” I answered in the affirmative. They said I sucked their blood and got on their nerves.

Now I just ask myself why they had even chosen me! Look at this ugly-ass shit with a disgusting demeanor and a freaking scrub. Ayoo, I am just exaggerating about myself, nothing else. I don’t often represnt myself in this way. But sometimes exaggerating is okay.

“What we think, we become.”

Yeah, just exaggerated.

So, it must have been an unfortunate choice for them. Probably a situation where they can’t decide whether to stay or to leave. I appreciate the good memories they offered and the lessons they taught. I hope they do well in life. It feels good to see people doing well who got potential.

In a few days they got their birthday. This year I don’t even stand a chance to wish or say some shit. For them it should be their new people to enjoy with… maybe. What to do! It’s up to them, right? Who am I to say? Nobody.

I miss them, it’s true, and who doesn’t want companies when BSOD is popping in their life? I wish I could get back to that point in life and resolve all the conflicts.

Sometimes life is good, and sometimes it becomes a bit harsh.

Let’s not talk anymore about this.

It was about an awful day. You see, we can talk a lot about the awful things that have happened to us, but we can’t really describe what wonderful things have happened to us or what one has done to us that briefly. For example, my last post. It wasn’t so brief or with overwhelmed emotions like this one.

I guess that was it. If you are facing pain in your body, then take some freaking NSAIDs and pay the fees of the doc. Got nobody to talk to? Write some words on the rock or wood.

It helps and actually saves you from many inconveniences too. Peace!